Tuesday, July 17, 2012

July, I fight your soul sucking super powers! I fight!

Hello,


I recently fell and cracked the back of my head on a very large rock. Adding a head injury to my typical bad mood in July is like adding vinegar to puke salad. I have weird memory gaps. For the first few days, I walked like I was on a boat, clutching furniture items to stabilize me. I slurred my speech. My friend, the Floozy Muzey, thought that maybe I had 'gone retarded' and that was okay, because she promised to wipe the drool off my face and take me to Disneyland with my entitled wheelchair pass, which everyone knows is the best thing ever, because you get to cut the lines.


I still might occasionally have random weirdness shooting out from my limbs or my mouth or my unmentionables. (Just kidding, about that last bit. No uterus, remember?) So, please forgive me. Right now my head feels like a bowling ball filled with neon cement. I get these occasional jolts of real pain and sudden-without-warning flash-floods of depression. BUT I WILL FIGHT IT. It super helps to not have a uterus this summer. The thought of adding PMDD to this month is simply mind-blowing. No PMDD! I fight you, July! 


Part of me just wants to sit around and embroider sad clowns while watching Hoarders on Netflix, but you know what? I am getting out. I am taking my kids to their swim lessons. I am going out to eat with visiting family. I am stitching always stitching. Yesterday, I had one of those sudden unexpected mood plunges, and this quote popped into my head.


Everything was beautiful and nothing hurt.


Isn't that the best? It's from Kurt Vonnegut's book Slaughterhouse Five.


To all of my friends, family members, and loved ones right now who are struggling, I want you to simply say this phrase in your head. Feel its magic. If I could, I would take away the hurt. But I can't. The best I can do is wipe away the drool and promise to take you Disneyland.





12 comments:

  1. I hope you get uncrazy soon, and I'm glad you're not permanently damaged. The world is a nicer/more bizarre place with you in it :D

    I got nothin wrong that a bucketful of gold nuggets won't solve.

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    1. Even if I am permanently damaged, I am okay with that. Maybe I can make something good out of it. Who knows. I still want to embroider a sad clown. So that might be an ever-present symptom of my condition.

      I heart you, Sarah!

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  2. This I love. I hope your head is empty of neon cement soon!

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    1. Thank you! Or at least bland grey cement, right?

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  3. I love that quote. When I was having a tough time at work this past year and had an unexpected GOOD day, that's what I would write in my journal.

    My niece is in a wheelchair and my sister always crows to me, "This month we get to go to Gimp Day at Disneyland!" Hell, yeah, wheelchairs are the best at Disneyland!

    I hope your noggin feels better soon!

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  4. One of my faves:

    Buffy: "You know, chocolate is the cure to everything."
    Willow: "I think I'm gonna puke..."
    Buffy: "...'cept that."

    Sorry about your broken head! I still want you to embroider a sad clown though. Not a scary clown, just a sad clown.

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    1. The fact that you quote Buffy to me wins you twenty thousand house points to Gryffimdor.

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  5. When my ex was in the hospital recovering from his brain injury I gave him a couple of sips of milk for dinner. His reply, "Whew! That's STRONG!". I asked him what he thought I had given him and he said straight whiskey! If ignorance isn't bliss I don't know what is...he slept like a drunken sailor that night. :) It will get better, just keep 'fighting like the boy with the mechanical heart'!

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    1. Ha! Milk mistaken for whiskey. That's similar to when I give my nine year old whiskey and she thinks it's milk.

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  6. Head injuries are scary, weird things! So glad to hear you are on the mend, and it wasn't a case of going retarded after all (I'm so adding that to the repertoire!).

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    1. I like how you can use the words retarded and repertoire in the same sentence. That is so you, Moxie. Funny and yet classy at the same time.

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